告白 (Confessions)

接納、認同與愛，都是每個人所追求的。

From Anger to Intimacy

1. Do not rehearse & spew anger, but study it - know why you are angry & what you want.
2. Men & women are wired differently: most men do not like the feeling of being controlled, they hate to feel powerless; most women do not like the feeling of being disconnected & rejected in relationships.
3. When angry, have a time-out for you & your spouse to find a solution & move toward resolution.
4. Humility asks God how to change & do differently.
5. Security comes from knowing that your mate loves you in spite of your flaws & shortcomings.
6. Do not repay (an eye for an eye) & replay (repeat playing) anger, but resolve it (make every effort to live at peace).
7. God gives you the power to think those things you should think, rather than the things you are thinking when you are angry.
8. Forgiveness is me giving up the right to hurt you for hurting me.
9. "Only the brave know how to forgive. A coward never forgives. It's not in his nature." - Robert Muller
10. Majority of your communication is nonverbal, but through your face.
11. When you care enough to find out what happened and why, your empathy establishes a foundation for reconciliation.
12. Apology: A flippant or insincere apology can do more damage than good; the point of listening is to understand the other person; with just one or two sentences of calm rather than mean, degrading or belittling, you can reduce threat level & extinguish anger.
    
13. Your relationship doesn't need both of you to change in this moment - just one of you need to make a change.
14. We should live every minute of every day as if it were our last-filled with passion & purpose.
15. When a woman's hope for a better marriage has faded, her attractiveness to her husband diminishes and the life of the relationship gradually declines.
16. Love unconditionally - instead of harboring bitterness or unresolved anger, don't wait for your partner to do something that warrants your offer of forgiveness.